A Very Self Centered Journal 1

I wonder if I could give someone proper criticism. It's properly because I feel like I'll hurt someone feelings or they will take it the work way. Which is mostly why I avoided commenting on anything in the first place. That voice is in the back of my head loves to nag at me. "Don't do it." "It not a good idea. ""Their just going to ingore you."  That the kind of thing that scares me.

I know I shouldn't be afraid but that thought always lingers in my mind. However, I don't wanna feel like hiding away from people and make them feel bad when no one comments on their picture. I don't want people to feel ingored and give up. Or just settle for being invisible. By the way I hate feeling invisble'. It got to be the most suckest feeling in the whole wide world. In high school it sucked. In college it sucked. To make it worse I never fought to be seen. I just stay quiet and I just freaking accept it.

To tell the truth I was a wimp when it comes to people I hardly know. To my family well it was differnt. Maybe because I'm comfortable with them I could should bit of my strength. Only bits cause deep down I was so weak. I don't my family knows it but I hate being weak. I want to be strong. No I don't open up to them as much either but at less I'm not invisible.

So that my fear everyone being invisible. No I don't wanna be the center of attenion cause I don't like it so much. In fact I hate as much as being invisible. To much attenion make me stressed out and I get a bit nervous. I don't wanna let people down but alas it will happen. That used to bother me but I learn to accept it. Also learn I should be afraid be wrong and just say what I think. Also learn when to keep my mouth shut.

Ladies and gentlemen I'm not very attenive and sometimes I'm a bubblehead.  Okay I went way of topic and I went into something else. I know an annoying habit. Where was I
...oh.

I get so much doubts when I comment on people art or journals. Trust me I wanna make artist friends and keep doing that. However I get doubts and those words in my head just keep going. Their still but I just ingore them and new voices come in.

Yet they shut up also when someone comments back and say thank you. I get happy. I know never reply and say your welcome but your welcome.

That is why this call a very self journal cause all I did was talk talk about my feelings. I'm so sorry to put you through but hey I like to talk a lot baby.